‘Earlier this year, I had the honour of officiating my 2,500th ceremony, a milestone that comes 27 years after I conducted my very first ceremony at Millbrook Resort on February 8, 1997. Over nearly three decades, I have had the privilege of presiding over a wide variety of ceremonies. While weddings have been the majority, my journey has also included renewal of vows, blessings, civil unions, and naming ceremonies. (This count does not include the many funerals and memorial services I have also conducted.)
‘Reflecting on these 2,500 ceremonies, I realize that this milestone means I have touched the lives of 5,000 people from all corners of the globe. Each of these individuals entrusted me with the immense responsibility of being a part of their significant life moments. In doing so, I have been invited into the heart of countless love stories, heard the most moving and beautifully crafted vows, and witnessed tears of joy, often while discreetly offering a tissue. I've shared in the laughter that rings out during these joyous occasions and ensured that every legal detail is meticulously handled as I sign the official paperwork.
‘Every ceremony has been a unique tapestry woven with emotions, stories, and traditions. I've had the pleasure of experiencing cultural rituals from around the world, learning from each couple about their unique journeys and what love and marriage means to them. These experiences have enriched my life beyond measure, offering me a front-row seat to the most intimate and joyous moments in people's lives.
‘As I look back on these 27 years, I am filled with gratitude for the trust and love that so many have shown me. It has been an extraordinary journey of connection, emotion, and celebration, and I look forward to continuing this beautiful path, creating more memories and touching more lives along the way.’
A Day in the Life
How long have you been a celebrant for?
From memory, I was appointed as a celebrant in late 1995, however my first ceremony was on 8th February 1997 – our gorgeous daughter was just 13 months old!
Why did you become a celebrant?
One Saturday morning friends rang to invite Bill (my husband) and me to their place for lunch before they flew to Fiji that afternoon. At that time, we owned and operated Dart River Wilderness Jet and Bill had to work that day and as I played competitive tennis on Saturdays, I said I’d pop in for a quick bite to eat before they went to Fiji and I played tennis. So, I turned up in my tennis clothes with some food to add to the lunch in one hand only to find out that they were about to be married in their backyard overlooking Lake Wakatipu!
Their marriage celebrant was from Wanaka and I had a few thoughts:
- This lady has the best job in the world!
- Why did they have to have a marriage celebrant from Wanaka? Weren’t there any in Queenstown?
- How can I become a marriage celebrant?
Time went by and the idea of becoming a celebrant was playing on my mind, and so with some encouragement from Bill and a dear friend David Williams, I started the process to apply to be a marriage celebrant.
It was different back then, the number of marriage celebrants in an area was restricted by Birth, Deaths and Marriages (BDM) and so after I had my interview, police check and my references were checked I had to wait for another female marriage celebrant to leave town before I could be appointed. Thank you, Mary Garvie, for deciding to retire to Australia as well as acting as a mentor for me before you left.
The letter from BDM congratulated me on being appointed as a marriage celebrant, however absolutely no guidance was provided.
I was on my own.
And so, I advertised in the Yellow Pages of the phonebook, had my name included in the list of Queenstown Celebrants in the Queenstown District Court, walked the streets dropping off flyers and spread the word as much as I could!
My first ceremony with Jeremy and Deanne was a heartwarming success. Little did this gorgeous couple know, it was my first time too!
I quickly realised I had found my passion. In my first year I officiated just 3 weddings, in 1998 22 and since then I haven’t looked back. Initially, I officiated at weddings, baby namings and renewal of vows, until on 26th April 2005 when civil unions were introduced, less than two weeks later I officiated my first civil union ceremony for Kate and Jan.
There were no planners then, venues, celebrants, florists etc all acted as planners. Popular Queenstown venues were Chapel by the Lake, Skyline, Millbrook Resort and Queenstown Gardens.
I travelled Central Otago and Southland for weddings – there was one wedding that the groom didn’t want the word ‘love’ mentioned!!
What involvement do you have or had with CANZ at a branch or national level?
I quickly realised I needed support to grow and develop my skills, to be honest I’m not sure when I joined CANZ – although initially, I joined the Celebrants Guild which was in time, incorporated into CANZ as it was agreed that there was no need for two similar groups for a small number of celebrants. I am the 54th member to have joined CANZ and have attended AGMs, development courses both in-person and online.
I’m also a founding member of the Queenstown Wedding Association.
What ceremonies do you perform?
Weddings, baby namings, renewal of vows, wedding blessings, civil unions, funerals, memorial services and living funerals.
What do you enjoy about being a celebrant?
I love my role as a celebrant – it’s never been a job, I never go to work, it’s a privilege and an honour to be a celebrant. With over 25 years of experience as a celebrant I have cherished every moment, as it has allowed me to be part of couples’ joyous life moments and to listen to their unique love stories, forever changing my own perspective on love.
I am fortunate to live in the most beautiful place in Aotearoa New Zealand and according to many, in the world, and because of this many couples have chosen a Queenstown destination wedding, which also brings with it many challenges.
There’s still excitement in the air when a couple chooses me as their celebrant – as there is so much choice now – I understand there are almost 70 celebrants in this area alone.
Then the fun begins. I connect with the couple initially with phone calls, Zoom, Facetime, Messenger etc and then I email them a list of questions that are designed to assist me to prepare two personal options for their ceremony that are personal to them.
Ceremonies are more complex now, more involved and therefore more interesting as couples like to include their different cultures, traditions, beliefs, their children and families, wine ceremonies, hand warming ceremonies, warming of the rings, rose ceremonies, unity candle ceremonies, tying the knot, their pets – all adding the couple’s personalities and beliefs. I love the variety this adds to a ceremony, the uniqueness and surprise element for their guests. I’m enjoying including Te Reo Maori in ceremonies, when requested, and I am very fortunate that my husband and daughter are both Te Reo Maori speakers.
I love writing each unique ceremony that reflects their life, their story, their relationship. After all, the ceremony is about them and for them, as it should be.
I believe the ceremony sets the tone of the couple’s best day of their life and I love being a part of it and making sure each ceremony is memorable. I am a storyteller … and each ceremony is delivered from my heart.
Often I wear many hats at a ceremony – I’ve calmed more grooms in the moments waiting for their bride to arrive than I can remember, I’ve carried shoes, wraps, jackets/coats, veils, spare hair clips, pinned on grooms’ buttonholes, cake cutter, bubbles pourer, toast proposer, tissue provider, confetti thrower, iPhone photographer, paper signer, veil chaser, spare pen carrier and many other roles as needed.
And the best moment, the absolute pinnacle for me, is presenting the couple to their loved ones as married and they walk/ dance/ skip up the aisle taking their first steps in the next chapter of their lives!! Watching and witnessing their pure joy and love – there’s nothing better than that moment!
This is when my heart is full!
What are some of the hardest parts of being a celebrant?
- Social media,
- Accounts (does anyone really enjoy doing accounts??)
- Entering a room filled with people who have just lost someone dear to them
- selling myself when couples are shopping for their celebrant
What was the most memorable ceremony you have performed?
My first ceremony as it was life changing, I’d found my passion.
What would be your typical day as celebrant?
There’s no such thing as a typical day – which is another reason why I love being a celebrant – the variety!!
I'm most creative in the morning, so after my coffee, I sit at my computer and craft each unique ceremony. For weddings, I prepare two personalised options, which has become an almost daily task.
On days when I have a wedding, renewal of vows, or blessing ceremony, I meticulously check my diary multiple times for the ceremony's timing, location, and any special clothing requirements (colours, boots, etc.). The ceremony script and license are prepared and placed in my folder the day before, and I recheck to ensure everything is in order. I pack my handbag with my folder, two pens, hand warmers for the bride (just in case), hair clips, and leave home 20-30 minutes early to avoid being the celebrant who is late (my biggest fear!)
Flexibility is increasingly important as elopements have become more common, often requiring date or time changes due to weather – something I never anticipated happening so frequently!
Some days, I receive calls from a funeral director or family member who has lost someone and would like my assistance. Whenever possible, I provide support.
On days with a funeral or memorial service, I focus entirely on my role for the day, unable to write. My phone is often busy with last-minute changes, such as a speaker cancelling or feeling unable to speak. Flexibility and understanding are crucial.
After each ceremony, I critique my performance to ensure continuous improvement and growth as a celebrant. Following a funeral or memorial service, I always enjoy a long walk with our black lab named Fern – an essential part of my self-care routine.
What advice do you have for someone new to the industry?
Find yourself a mentor, socialise with others in this wonderful industry, be flexible, continuously grow your skills, and most importantly, enjoy the journey!
How do you like to relax?
We live in one of the most beautiful places in the world, and I love immersing myself in nature. Whether it's walking, biking, reading by the lakefront, enjoying picnics at the lake with friends, going on 4WD trips with my husband, or planning our next adventure, I cherish every moment spent outdoors.
And the odd wee glass of pinot, of course!
