By Jane Godfrey
With wedding season well and truly here, the question is, do you really need a ceremony rehearsal? Here are 15 questions to ask yourself:
1. Am I confident with how each part of the ceremony is going to go?
2. Are my wedding party confident with how each part of the ceremony is going to go?
3. Is everyone who has anything to do in the ceremony confident with how their part in the ceremony is going to go (reader, witnesses, person playing the music...)?
4. Have the children who are involved met the celebrant, and are they confident walking towards them and working with them?
5. Has the celebrant supplied me with a script that has ‘stage directions’ as well as the words being said, so that I can visualise how the ceremony is going to unfold?
6. Am I confident with which side of my partner I want to be standing on?
7. Do I know at what angle the sun will be on the day and if it will be uncomfortable for anyone?
8. Do I know who will be sitting in the front row and on what side, how many seats are in the front row, and what the options are for seating configurations at the venue?
9. Am I confident with my music choices and the sound system that will be used?
10. Am I confident that the microphone being used is suitable and reliable?
11. Am I confident walking in the shoes that I will be wearing for my wedding, considering the venue may have grass, slopes, steps or gravel...?
12. Am I confident that nothing will be forgotten on the day (rings, candles, pen for signing, bubbles for the children...)?
13. Am I, and everyone else involved, confident with Plan B should the weather turn to custard?
14. Am I cool, calm, completely organised, and not needing reassurance of any kind?
15. Has it actually sunk in that I am getting married tomorrow/in a few days? Has my heart kept up with all of my event planning?
If you can answer YES to all of the above, then NO, you probably don’t need a wedding rehearsal.
If you can’t answer yes, then maybe a rehearsal is a gift to everyone involved?
I find that rehearsals are a fabulous way of preparing for your wedding day – both physically and emotionally.
There are often tears at a wedding rehearsal: tears of joy, tears of pride, tears of exhaustion... All of that overwhelming emotion is dispelled and a calm joy takes its place on the day. It is a wonderful transition for me to watch.
Couples are more present, more centred, and more able to hear their partner's words of love.
Friendships deepen, family bonds strengthen – feeling confident helps all of your special people be fully present on the day.
Obviously, if you are eloping with 10 close friends, you don’t have a wedding party and your ceremony is super simple with no ‘choreography’, then a rehearsal is not required.
BUT, don’t let anyone else persuade you whether you need a wedding rehearsal or not.
Only YOU can decide that. So, ask yourself those 15 questions above, chat with your partner, follow your gut, and decide what is best for you both.
